Bleaching effect!!

Somehow this season has been too tough and rough on me. There are no major gains and I see no significant changes in life either. I m so very disoriented can any anyone really help to get my sanity back in place. No amount of adulation and wisdom words effect me any more. I really want to work towards a peaceful soul followed by my mind. I don't want any circumstances that bleaches me out of my true identity because what will remain after that will be lifeless.